Tuesday, 15 March 2011

From Wisconsin, With Love

007, this is for your eyes only.

We have been reliably informed that SPECTRE (Supreme Plutocratic Executive for Counter-intelligence, Terrorism, Revenge and Extortion) is planting a union-busting bomb in Wisconsin. If detonated, it would eliminate all collective bargaining powers of that state’s workers, and leave its victims with no hope of ever having their plunging wages resuscitated. The fallout from that explosion would then spread to other states where a similar level of devastation could follow.

Your mission is to unmask the SPECTRE operatives who have infiltrated the highest political offices in Wisconsin and ensure their hold on power is terminated through Project Recall (http://www.actblue.com/page/recallrepublican8).

This is not an isolated incident. SPECTRE has been planning for some time to secure world domination by an elite of the rich and powerful, with resistance at all levels systematically eliminated. Having successfully removed regulatory protection in the finance sector, it helped its banking partners extort trillions from the British and American governments to fund their casino racket. Through its vast media network, it is daily spreading misinformation about Mexicans, Muslims, and moderate politicians, making out that they are the enemies when in reality it continued to amass more power for the wealthy few to dictate terms to the rest of the population.

While in Wisconsin, you should also investigate the related SPECTRE conspiracy to undermine environmental protection efforts in the US which would substantially increase the risk of damages to the rest of the world. Wisconsin has been targeted for green measures to be removed, in line with moves in other states to blow up the barriers holding back corporate polluters. This is part of SPECTRE’s plan to degrade the living conditions of all those who cannot afford to retreat to privileged locations, and put a premium on the ‘clean’ air and water it would then sell through its exclusive outlets.

Once you have completed your mission in Wisconsin, you should report to our Washington office for your next assignment – concerning one of SPECTRE’s American subsidiaries plotting to replace our National Health Service with a market system designed to serve only those who could help it make a handsome profit.

Good luck, 007.

Thursday, 3 March 2011

The Murdoch Empire Strikes Back

Long, long time ago, in a galaxy not so far away, Murdoch extended his media empire to cover the Sun, the Sky, and much else besides.

He had a simple vision: rich and powerful people like him would be praised, poor and vulnerable people like the jobless and refugees would be condemned, and any politician who doesn’t support him would be vilified. One part of his empire was even known for hacking into the phones of public figures, including politicians, to dig up information which could be used against them.

But many were beginning to get fed up with the imperious arrogance of the emperor, and when he plotted to take even greater control of the few media outlets outside his clutches, an opposition was formed to stop him. It could be a new dawn – people might once again find truth in the media and not be battered by the insidious propaganda onslaught launched by Murdoch and his henchmen.

Alas, Cameron has come to the emperor’s rescue. A great admirer of Murdoch’s vision of the world, he learnt from the master by hiring one of his most trusted lieutenants, the one who presided over the phone-hacking division of the empire, and then met with the emperor’s son to talk about what would be in their mutual interest to discuss (we cannot tell you what exactly they discussed because in case evidence should come forth about any gross impropriety, Cameron has refused to disclose the contents of their conversation ahead of the Government’s decision to refer or not Murdoch’s latest takeover bid to the Competition Commission).

Now all the promise of halting Murdoch’s latest bid to expand his media empire even further, of giving it scrutiny and tight controls, has vanished. There will be no referral to the Competition Commission. Murdoch, with Cameron’s connivance, can do whatever he wants. In return, Murdoch’s media will no doubt praise Cameron to the sky.

The only ‘concession’ is that while Murdoch will continue to fund Sky News, he would not be ‘personally’ directing its editorial policy. Sky News will tell its audience whatever it wants to regardless of its paymaster. Cameron is very satisfied with this. It is a very good step forward for everyone. If you don’t believe it, you can tune into Sky News, or read the Sun, or the News of the World, or if you want to follow the story about why pigs can fly thanks to the latest Republican Party policies, there’s always Fox News.